Idols Top Twelve Covers Modest Mouse "Float On"

Please, just shoot me now or pull my Internet connection. Either way, it’s killer. This cover by American Idol's Top Twelve contestants is a slow antagonizing trip to Modest Mouse’s ultimate doom. It’s like smoking. The first drag won’t kill you, but the after-effects will.

Still recovering from the paralyzing shock, I can only list the reasons as to why this video breaks my Modest Mouse-loving heart. One: The contestants are trying way too hard to be cool. But despite portraying hipsters from every urban category, not a single contestant embodies one ounce of cool. Two: Of all Modest Mouse songs to cover, the one they picked is the most over-played. Before last night, I already ran away -- far, far away -- every time “Float On” came up in my iTunes. So this cover makes me want to curl up in the corner and cry.